Once I get to work and I am more awake for the day, I eat my breakfast and take my pills. Then it is just a regular day of living. Sometimes I am happy, sometimes I am sad, and sometimes I am just even keeled as anyone would be on any given day. I do not have the super extremes of depression or mania which happens with bipolar disorder. This is how the pills help me.
Every now and then something happens and I miss my morning pills. This happened today. When I was at work, I got my fruit and yogurt out to eat and grabbed my pill box. I looked and the pill box was empty! "Oh no, this must be the one from yesterday." I thought. Right then I knew that later in the day I would be feeling "funny."
Let me explain that. "Funny" to me means anything odd, different, or strange that I feel. "Funny" feelings are mostly the physical things and sensations that change within me. These sensations usually come on between 3-5 hours after I have missed my daily dose of medication.
- sight gets fuzzy
- taking long exaggerated blinks with my eyes (trying to make things clear again).
- a sensation of dizziness at times
- odd skin sensations
- tightness or clenched jaw
- clenched fists or other muscle tightness
- digestive issues
- tightness in chest
- sounds become far away or like waves in my ears
- brain zaps, like the feeling of being buzzed
- being "not with it"
- sensation of separateness from what is happening in the present
Staying mentally healthy for a person with bipolar disorder is an everyday things including many different aspects. One aspect of that for me is taking medications. I must think about this everyday. I must remember.
What I go through with bipolar disorder is not what everyone goes through. Each person is unique. I write this just to help you understand a side to taking these types of medications that you may not know about. And, if I am having an off day or feeling "funny", this might be why. Please be gentle with me. I will come back around.